more than once, i've seen the way you look at her. more than once, i've seen the way she looks back at you. more than once, i've given you both what they call the benefit of the doubt. more than once i've tried to see things differently. more than once, i've tried to convince myself that i was just concluding too hastily. more than once, i've tried to convince myself that my vision was clouded and that i was seeing things the way that i wanted to see them. maybe that's still what i'm doing. but more than once, you've crushed everything i thought and let me see just how stupid i am for trying to think otherwise of you.
i know this is not the way i should behave. i know this is not the way i should think. i am sinning against Him more than against anyone when i remain this unforgiving. but i cannot help it. i cannot help but feel this way. i cannot help but be this unforgiving.
you've done it once. you've done it twice. a third time, perhaps. so another time is not far off. you could keep denying that, say that you're different now. you could say that. but i don't think i'd believe you.
do you even take notice of what you do? of where you do it? of why you do it? and of who you hurt in the entire process? i don't think you do. i don't think you consider any of that when you do what you do. i've warned him. i haven't told her. but i think one side is enough. you can't hold a piece of bread buttered on both sides without getting your hands dirty.
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